hilarious mime...

Good Ol' Chuck.....

It takes Chuck Norris 30 minuets to watch 60 minuets.

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.

There is no chin under Chuck Norris' beard. It's another fist.

Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa the smile.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming "Law" and "Order" are trademarked names for his left and right leg.

Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water, and MAKE it drink.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch. He DECIDES what time it is.

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up enough courage to tell him.

Superman owns a pair of Superman Pajamas.

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits.

When Chuck Norris is doing a push-up, he isn't pushing himself up, he's pushing the whole world down.

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.

According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.

Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toe, he accidentally destroys chairs, bed-frames and sidewalks.

It's believed that dinosaurs are extinct due to a giant meteor. That's true if you want to call Chuck Norris a giant meteor.

Arnold Schwarzenegger stole the phrase "Get into the chopper, NOW" from Chuck.

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Chuck Norris' fists are named Shock and Awe.

Chuck Norris is the reason that Larry the Cucumber (Veggie Tales) doesn't have any arms.

Chuck Norris has knocked out so many teeth that he could make a real-life model of a shark head.

truly grateful...

Yesterday was my 25th birthday. Yes, I'm getting old. Every year, I don't usually celebrate my birthday. Its usually jut dinner with the family and dinner with Jasmine on another day. However, this year was a surprise. Firstly, Jasmine and my parents planned surprise birthday party for me. I was really touched. It was held at my place but everyone who came told me how hard Jasmine had been working the last few weeks calling everyone and planning everything. For that, I am truly, truly grateful. Thank you darling. It really meant a lot to me. Secondly, on my birthday yesterday I was on guard duty. I know you all maybe thinking how can I be so unlucky right. In all honesty, I wasn't really bothered about it. I mean, I already had a wonderful surprise birthday party on Saturday. So, there I was, in camp doing guard duty on my birthday. You know what, my colleagues surprised me by coming into office at 10pm last night bringing food and a birthday cake. They said that they couldn't let me celebrate my birthday all lone in office doing guard duty. So they brought food and a cake to celebrate with me. I was really really touched. It's really nice to know that I have such good friends. I am definitely one lucky guy!

a bastard in an officer's uniform...

I love soccer. You can say that I'm crazy about it. Any time, any place. I could have a broken leg and still try to play soccer. Being in the army, soccer games are hard to come by. For the last 4yrs I've been representing my team in SAFSA soccer competitions. I've been the captain for the last 2yrs. This yr was no different. Once again, as captain, I played in the SAFSA soccer tournament. However last saturday I injured myself. I was playing in the annaual Methodist Welfare Society soccer competition. Its a charity tournament that helps raise funds for the needy. During the first match, I busted my knee. At first I thought it was a minor thing and tried to ice it down. The pain got worse and finally I gave up and went to Changi General Hospital. I went to the A&E to see the doctor. After a few x-rays and having some kind of painkiller injected to numb my knee, the doctor said that there was no bone or ligament damage. It was a knee muscles and tendons that were strained. I was given 3 days mc and 3 weeks of light duties. That meant no soccer for 3 weeks. What happened the following monday got me really pissed. This was the conversation I had with my SAFSA coach on my phone on monday.

Coach: Rupen, don't be late for today's match.
Rupen: Sorry coach. I won't be able to play today. I busted my knee on sat in a charity match. Doctor says no football for 3 weeks.
Coach: Don't bluff me la. You lazy to play today just say so. Don't give me this bullshit story about injuring your knee.
Rupen: What? Sir, I really injured my knee. I was at Changi Hospital. I have a doctor's MC.
Coach: Don't give me this attitude la Rupen. Just because I didn't let you start the last match you want to give me attitude right.
Rupen: Sir, if you don't believe me, you can come to my house and I'll pass you my doctor's letter. What you mean I giving you attitude? I'm the captain of the team. I've been playing for you for the last 4yrs. How can you say I would give this kind of excuse?
Coach: Its okie la Rupen. I know you la. You just like everyone else. Just because I put you on as a sub in the second half you want to give me attitude. Its okie. Nevermind. Next time you will get the same thing back.
Rupen: Sir, I have no idea what you're talking about. But if you are trying to question my integrity towards the team. After playing under you for 4yrs and you think I'll bluff you about an injury, then I'm sorry. You can find yourself another captain. I QUIT!

Well, I won't be playing for any more SAFSA tournaments. I'm glad too. After 4yrs, this is the thanks I get. Its fine with me. I've got better things to do with my life anyway. SAFSA soccer can go screw themselves. I know half the team has quit anyway. Coach, you can go find yourself a new team and captain. Screw you coach and screw you SAFSA.

the clock is ticking...

Words; they hit you like a bombshell.
A cheap shot to your side.
Before you realize what has happened, it hits you.
Like an avalanche.
Fast, unforgiving.
Its white surface contradicts the color of purity.
Maybe I deserve it. Go on! Pile them on.
Buried under the cascade of truth.
Nothing I can say will redeem me.
Am I a lost cause?
I don't know. At least not yet.
Don't give up on me.
There is still some hope.
Like a phoenix, I will rise from the ashes.